Since the outbreak of this crazy fuckin’ virus has the whole world freaking out I thought I’d be good to share a list of 10 CoronaVirus Symptoms to look out for.
#1 Sneezing, CoronaVirus Symptoms are Similar to Flue Symptoms
So the virus makes you sneeze and cough and shit like that. I mean idk what you expected this is standard sick things.
#2 Respiratory Problems
Your lungs might get all fucked up. Like I’m pretty sure this is one of the danger-zone symptoms, but honestly I didn’t google it. But apparently YOU did, and that’s probobly how you landed on this trash site.
Yea, this shit makes you get a fever. So basically this is the last half-assed attempt and using real information for this post. Enjoy everything going downhill from here.
Have you started sending pics of your nether regions to people who don’t want to see that shit? Well then my dude, you may want to see a doctor. Or don’t. I’m not your dad.
#5 Doing Meth is one of the CoronaVirus Symptoms??
Had a sudden, unexplained urge to start doing Meth? Bad news bruh, you MIGHT have CoronaVirus. Or CORVID-19 if you want to be all accurate n’ shit.
#6 Going Vegan and Obnoxiously Judging Meat Eaters
Do you suddenly suck as a person? Then you may. have contracted the virus, or you just suck. I’m not a doctor, idk.
#7 Getting into Fist Fights With Strangers in Walmart Parking Lots
Have you suddenly lost all self control and dignity? Started going to Walmart, wearing ill-fitting jeans and a stained white tank-top? Well then, I’ve got bad news for you buddy.
#8 Getting Blackout Drunk and Being Kicked out of Denny’s
Even Denny’s won’t deal with your messy drunk ass? then you my friend, may have that virus thing everyone’s freaking over.
#9 CoronaVirus Symptoms Even Include Becomeing a White Person Who Loudly Sings the N-Word Parts of Rap Songs
I mean, idk what to tell you man.
#10 Trying to Break into Ted Cruise’s House While Fucked Up on PCP
I’m running out of stupid ideas to put. in tthis list.
good luck surviving the apocalypse.